Danny is being horrendous. It probably only started at the beginning of May. But it's so bad I can't really remember what it was like to enjoy spending time with him. He's so hateful and mean to me and all the kids. Luckily he still mostly likes Bob. I hope it'll clear up soon. Or at least if it doesn't get better soon I think the end of school will really help. Bob and I went to see Valerie Dimmick about 2 weeks ago. She said we need to be unemotional and set out all the rules and then when he breaks the rules or after 5 minutes of non-compliance we take away his favorite thing for 24 hours. He's currently lost his phone until his grades come up and he's lost basketballs for 48 hours.
Bob and I also talked to Valerie about us when we went there. It was really helpful. She told us how we process information is pretty much exactly opposite. I want to talk it out and he wants to think about it. I've felt for a long time that I carry most of the responsibility for our family and kids. So we got to talk about that. Since he doesn't want to talk about anything I assume he's not thinking about it. And he waits for me to tell him what to do most of the time. So we talked about how we need to set up times to have conversations and then we each take turns telling our view using only "I" statements and then we use all that information to make a decision. It's been really helpful so far.
No comments:
Post a Comment